I can remember everything as if it was yesterday

It seems like it was yesterday Januarary 3rd 2005 the exact day we met. You came over in the morning and spoke breifly, then we went to panera bread for lunch. I remember thinking you were cute when you smiled. We then started to hang out after a while, remember, playing pool, arthurs, those stupid laser tag get togethers, and all the countless stupid things the whole group did. But to me it wasn't stupid, because i got to you, We went sledding once by your house you and me and Just you and me, oh wait forgot about katrina, Then we went to the grind and i was sick of acting real towards katrina because obviously she was acting fake towards me, always kissing my ass, telling me what i wanted to hear, inevitably knowing that all she really was to go out with me. I knew it was bullshit and for some reason or another i knew that you knew. Later discovering that you lied to her about past and present things just to keep her quiet and so you wouldn't be judged. I understood but i knew that you were different. that you were more open minded and that you could see and understand my point of view. I started liking you more and more each day. Then do you remember being on Katrinas bed when you were tickling me and i didn't know it then but later you told me thats when you first started to like me. I kept acting like an asshole just to see how long it would be before she would stop kissing my ass and start being herself. I looked around each time we were together and besides you i just saw sad empty pathetic people sobbing on what the world owes them and what they don't have. I thought what a waste of space, time, and food. Then there was you a person i could relate to, and someone that would see me for me. someone that knew what i was talking about and saw the same things i did, like secret agents we would discuss these peoples insecurites and laugh at their petty problems. More and more i became the asshole and just like i thought everyone but you trisha turned on me. i was swept in a sea of rumors of being a drug dealer, and still doing drugs. Then we started to become closer and closer. glancing at each other more often, the first night on the couch remember Alien V.S. Predator holding each other for the first time. and i know that made Kat furious envious and all this time she never could understand why i never liked her and the reason for that was she was a fake pathetic person oblivious to anyone elses needs besides her own, not to mention that i wasn't attracted to her like i was with you. I remember looking at you for the first time. I remember seeing a girl that was intelligent, funny, kind, and beautiful to my eyes. I savour every moment i've had with you. remember the times in the Van and the Neon, me just lieing there looking at you listening to music, smoking ciggerettes, staring at each other, touching each other and smiling with each other. and then when i kissed you and you rejected me at first, for a second i thought that you didn't like me and i made a mistake but my mistake was thinking that, cause about 5 seconds later you leaned in and kissed me back. Remember me asking you out in the van march 5th and you said yes. and how that pissed everyone off, how they thought me and you weren't meant to be. And then dave yes dave the kid that sent you messages telling you how beautiful you were and how if you would break up with me then he would break up with anna in a heartbeat, and how you were joking with him that you broke up with me and he lit up thinking yes that is so cool, now shes not with that guy i hate, now the competition is out of the way, but then when the punchline hit it probably was like a stab to his heart and i wish i could've been there to laugh, and how he tried to get with you but he FAILED! HE FAILED! YES YES YES YES!!!!!
because he knows that he never could be with someone as beautiful and intelligent as you HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! And they desperately tried to pull us apart but actually they just brought us closer together. Once they accepted us being together, by then they knew that i had converted you fully to the DARK SIDE! and that you could never turn back, I stole you from them YES! YES! and i wish i could've felt the hate and rage it brought them , as i basked in the glow of my supposed arrogance and my enormous ego. But you and only you knew it was a role i was playing, i figured why be real with a bunch of people that were fake, and are scared to be real, i mean come on if i had kept being real i would probably still be sitting there listening to a emo song about people crying about something pointless cause they have no meaning, and no real substance in their life. I would also be hearing some bullshit about converting to Christianity, even though the people that go to that church turn around after church and goe out to become the same miserable hypocritical people they still are. This was not my idea of fun only you were.
I was the real me because you showed me the real you. you were the only real person i knew out of that group. you weren't judgemental, nor thickheaded, and you actually thought on your own and you knew that it was bullshit. and then there was sharing that special moment, and me looking at you and knowing it was right and meant to be. the times at the beach, watching raw at your house, sharing newports and marlboro menthols, going to Logans on our first date, you going to see Star Wars Revenge of the Sith with me LOL I know i'm a dork. And that one time that seems like yesterday when i told you that i Loved you and you lit up because you already loved me. at that point there i just let go of everything and wanted to change for you, My mission became making you happy and it still is. Because everytime i see you smile, my heart melts and i get butterflies. being in your arms when we kiss is the best place in the world. I just thought you might want to remember that. Know that i always love you and that i miss you like crazy. only 7 more days
Much Love
Ryan James Boyd